2009

So here we go, 2009 is here and I am ready for it....

The first day of a new year always brings excitement, resolutions and a sense of starting fresh.

This will be a big year for me and it will really kick off next weekend, with the moving up here of Matthew, it is weird to think we have an apartment sitting over there and soon he will reside there. It as been a long (but good) 5 years but being apart the whole time does bring some worry to the table. As I explain it to every one that asks the question " are you nervous"?, the answer is yes but it is an excited nervous...

I am excited because of the obvious, we are finally going to be together in a normal relationship. I get to wake up next to him every morning, and kiss him goodbye before I leave for work, and fall asleep in his arms every night. We get to fall in to a routine, have date nights, hang out with friends.

The nervousness, I explain it as, in the movie "Elizabethtown" when they meet up again after talking on the phone for that long time and they look at each other and say " We peaked on the phone", what if this only works they way we have been doing things for 5 years. In the way the phone is easier because you can just hang up. Matthew and I do fight, but it is easier for me on the phone because one, he isn't here so I don't actually have him here staring me in the face, I am not good with confrontation so him not being here makes so I don't get overwhelmed and I can get my point across. I have gotten a lot better, a thicker skin but we have never fought face to face before.

The level of excitement when he is here, when we see one another for the first time in months that there isn't time to fight, I feel like we just got together and that new love smell is still all over us ( this is meant to be like a new car smell, not dirty). I know when he moves here the shinny-ness of him living here is going to be huge and take awhile to dull but what happens when it does? When it is an everyday thing, when we are always together, in each others space? That is what I am worried about.

So we shall see what this new chapter has in store..

Love to all.

A soon to be Mrs.