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Welcome! My name is Mrs.G and I started this blog so people could share in my mis-adventures in wedding planning. I married my southern gentleman on September 6th, 2009. Throughout our courtship I became enamored with everything southern and desperately want to become a steel magnolia.
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Tuesday, May 11, 2010

Just call me June

It came up in conversation about what I wanted to do with my life (yes I am still getting those talks) and I when I told this said person what I really wanted to do you would have thought I said change my name to kevin and return my taco for a hot dog... yeah I just went there.

I know what you are asking yourself, "what could she have possibly said?" You want to know what I said? I said that I wanted to be a stay at home mom. That's it, I got a blank stare and then asked "why?" In way that rubbed me as rough as a brillo pad, I didn't feel the need to defend my answer so all I said was "Cause."

What is the issue today with wanting to do it the June Clever way? Stay home to care for your children and maintain your home. Pearls are optional of course.

I mean is there a stigma towards it? That because I am a stay at home mom that it is by my husbands force and he keeps me pregnant and chained to the stove?

I have my personal reason that if said person would have been nice about asking me why I would have been more than happy to answer, so I am going to answer them now.

Ahem...

* I am not trying to paint and ill or tragic picture of my Mom or childhood, I had a great childhood and I have the world's best mom, yes I maybe biased,but if you challenge me on this fact I will evoke the power of Chuck Norris and round house kick you back to the medieval times where you shall get bubonic...*

where was I? Oh yeah.

I came from a single parent household with 2 kids. My mom had to get us ready every morning and off to school, work all day, run us around to various activities, cook dinner, clean, help us with homework, do bath time, check for monsters under the bed and so needless to say my mom was wiped out at the end of the day but she did everything with a smile on her face. I knew even then that she wanted to be home with my Brother and I but she couldn't.

So my child hood was filled with baby sitters (some good and some bad), days spent at my Grandma's house or, my poor brother, days at home with him watching me. We never had sit down meals, brown bag lunches, costumes made by hand for report day, crafts anything like that and to me that was fine because that is what I knew as the norm.

It wasn't until I was much older, and when I started actually thinking about kids that I knew that, even though my mom did an amazing job, I wanted more.

I want to be that mom.

You all know what I am talking about, the one that bakes cookies for the bake sale, has the big birthday party with the cake made from scratch, sits down with her children and finger paints. A mom that focuses 100 % on her kids.

I have never nor will I ever been career driven, I have never seen myself pounding the pavement in a power suit, taking working lunches and getting home at the wee hours in the morning. As Jennifer Anitson says in the movie "Marley and Me" : "when I am at work all I can think about is home, when I am at home all I can think about is work. I don't want to do this half way, and I don't want to give this up. (this isn't exact, I can't find the quote but you get the idea)" I think this speaks to most new moms that have to go back to work in a few short weeks after labor.


So what is the big deal with Traditional vs. non traditional? What does that even mean anymore?

4 comments:

  1. I think some people have that stigma that SAHM are weaker because their husbands are the sole source of income but if I had the chance, hell if I had some kids, I would love to be a SAHM. There are so many more options and outlets now for SAHM's than back in the old days where they were stuck in the house.

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  2. If it were financially possible for us, I would quit and stay with my kids and love every minute of it. Not because I'm meek or timid, but because I know all too well those years fly by and I want to soak up every second I can. Sadly I have to work outside the home. But I can dream!

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  3. A-freakin-men sister. I always get the 'girlwhatyoutalkinbout' look from people when I tell them that I dont want to do anything when I grow up. Just stay at home and have babies... I'm sorry is there something in my teeth? thought not. It's annnoying. Why can't women want to stay home? It's not like I'm a anti-feminist or anything.... weird.

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  4. I've known forever that I wanted to be a mother. I've never had really high career aspirations because I've always known that someday I'm going to have lots of babies and I want to be able to stay home (as much as possible) with them. That being said, now that I am 4 months pregnant and the reality of staying at home is in my future, I'm not sure at this point that that's what I want to do all day, every day. Financially, we could make it work, but it would be tough. Socially and emotionally, I think that I need to work a few days a week, so that's what I'm going to try to do (I think I may change my tune once that precious creature hits the universe!). All that being said, I have a true respect for women who stay home with their children. It IS a job. Raising another human being to be a respectful, successful human being is a job, and it should be respected and not looked down upon.

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