hmpf.

Pork tenderloin, sauerkraut and green beans

that was the menu at my house last night.

I made dinner for my mom and I and did everything to a T. I looked up how long and at what temp to cook the pork, I checked the meat with my trusty meat thermometer and put it back in for an extra 15 mins just to be sure. And about 2 hours afterwards we both started to feel sick. Yes, I think I made my mom and I sick.....

I have had to cancel plans for the night as I can not be more the 3 feet from a restroom, just as a precaution. Boo to being sick.

I just ate a small lunch and can tell it was to soon. Pray I can make it through the rest of the day.

The Healthy life: Grocery shopping

I.love.grocery.shopping.

End of story. It is quite possibly my favorite day of the week, from making the list, hunting for coupons and scoring some awesome deals. It is just shoots adrenaline right through me.

Before my healthy life quest it would take me maybe 30 minutes to go major shopping, this has drastically changed. Now it probably takes me an hour, I am the lady that is standing in the canned food aisle taking forever and a day comparing labels, you may think I am crazy standing there with 2 identical cans of corn, staring intently at their label but that is what I do now. I have to make the healthiest choice and if that takes an extra 5 minutes then so be it. It will be worth it when I am at my goal weight.

I know it will get easier, I mean I have made strides since my first shopping trip with hubs. Who, coincidentally is no longer allowed to come with me to the store. If he gave me the puppy eyes one more time I was going to wallop him. I remember having to refer back to some notes I had jotted down about sodium, grams of fat and calories. I will say it isn't that cost effective to be healthy, the cost of fresh produce takes a huge chunk out of my budget but I just can't bring myself to buy asparagus in a can.

here are a few things I do to makes things easier:
1. Plan, Plan, Plan. I plan my dinners for 2 weeks and that gives me a start to my list
2. I have my list made, coupons ready to go on pay day so I can hit the store before I go home, this way I am not tempted to go out to eat on payday.
3. I always have a snack before I go to the store. Going to the grocery store on a empty stomach is never a good idea and I will always buy things I will regret. This fact isn't scientifically proven but it needs to be.
4.I write my list in order of how I shop, I try to hit the outside of the aisles first because that food usually is less processed which equals less sodium and preservatives.

There you go ladies, Have a wonderful Friday Eve!

Sign me up!

After much consideration, this weekend I will join the the glamours ladies of Mary Kay!

That's right! I am going to become an independent beauty consultant and I couldn't be more thrilled with my decision. I needed a part time job anyway so why not trying something new, with a product I love, on my own time and on my own terms.

After trying Mary Kay I haven't looked back. I am not going to lie, I was a little skeptical at first because when someone said Mark Kay I thought of older women, pink Cadillacs and the mom from Edward Scissor hands (I know she was Avon but I thought of her none the less). But I was totally blown away by there products. At that point I had what I like to call a make up counter (or makeup jail as I heard it put on Saturday) in my very on bathroom.

I am a product junkie, weather it be make up,shampoo or some other bottle of elixir, when a new product hit the shelves you can bet within a week it would be in my cart in the checkout line. I think it was the excitement, the possibilities that come when you get a new product. Being that I am said junkie there were times of let down, when the shampoo made my hair lifeless and flat, the new beauty mask made my skin break out but more often than not make up let me down the most. I would battle through a bad shampoo, find a friend that wanted the beauty mask but with the make up you knew after one use if you liked it or not and that stuff is harder to find takers on because it is YOUR skin tone or YOUR color choices. After the initial grieving process the unwanted purchase always went to the plastic Rubbermaid container under my sink aka the makeup counter. I am not sure why I kept it, I guess I thought after awhile it would change or I would change... kind of sounds like a bad relationship...

The straw the broke the camels back was the Lash Blast mascara from Cover Girl. I loved the commercial, with spunky Drew Barrymore looking cute in a white suit, promising me big, bold look at me lashes I was hooked. I wanted it and when I walked down the florescent lit aisle I found the magic tube of mascara in WATERPROOF!!!!!!!! I didn't think this day could get any better, I went to check out and I handed the cashier a $20 because this tube of goodness cost about $10. I thought "I can't put a price on big, bold look at me lashes." So I grabbed my change and went home and did my usual ritual of using my new product as soon as humanly possible. I put on some music, and started my beauty regime on my fresh face. It could hardly stand waiting for the mascara step because I never break out of my make up routine, for anything and the mascara was always the last thing I put on. When it was time I opened the package and looked at the brush, it was one of those rubber grabby ones (that look like a french tickler) and I was little disappointed. The brush itself was huge but the last 1/4 inch was nothing but these little nubbin things, no bristles, I brushed it off and I slide the applicator in the tube and swirled it around. I pulled it out and started applying it, I noticed how clumpy it was, the formula was so thick that it just globbed on my eyelashes and made them stick together I looked like Tammy Fae Baker, my she rest in peace.

Doubting my mascara application skills, I wiped eye lashes off and then the brush and decided to try again, same thing. At this point I knew that this product was a bust, I already had one eye done and I figured I could use my eye lash brush to fix eye number one so I finished. And remember what I said about the piece of the brush that only had little nubbins well when I went to finish eye number 2 and I was brushing my inner lashes I had to hold the brush so close to my nose so my inner lashes could get some some love that I glooped black mascara all over my self....

To the plastic bin the tube went. I was mad, mad that it was such a bad product, mad that I was out $10 and mad that I had Black waterproof Mascara all over my face.

At this point I was late for my very first Mary Kay Party. So I got the black smudge off of my face and walked to my bestest house and fell in love.

Needless to say I walked away with face wash, the micro derm kit, some eye make up and remover and have been buying the product ever since. I know I can sell this product because I think every woman out there has had a story like mine and then they are stuck. Either they can't return the product because it is open or they won't because they don't want more crappy product. Not to mention I can sell this product because it is A.MAZ.ING!!!

Wish me luck on my new venture!

The Healthy life: Almost there

Last night I was doing my usual thing..... dreading the body test on the wii fit, but I knew I had to do it.

I needed to shake things up a bit so I decided to lay off the wii fit and did the Dancing with the stars Latin Cardio Dance and while I feel like a complete doofus when trying the moves, I do work up a nice sweat and can feel the burn.

I brace for what I think is going to be an inevitable let down and I tell myself "if you have gained weight you know why and you know how to get it off."

and to my surprise....

I am down 4.4lbs!!!!!!!

I am so close to 7.5 lbs I can almost taste it!

I can't wait to go home and bust a move, work up a sweat and burn some calories... 3 more lbs to go!!!

little bit of this, little bit of that

This weekend was nice/ok.

Friday I was kind of having a down day, I think last week was a down week (you can really tell if you go back and read my blogs) but Friday in particular was bad. My mom came over and watched Greys and I made spaghetti for everyone. It was an early night to bed and I needed it.

Saturday was supposed to be craft day but fundage became an issue, And with it being so glum and rainy I kind of just wanted to snuggle up and watch some tv but I went to a Mary Kay facial party instead. I think it was a good trade off. The Mary Kay party was fun. I got to listen to some of the directors talk and hear their stories and to tell you the truth it really inspired me. To hear these women take control of their lives in a way that puts their family first (in 2 cases on Saturday) and still be successful was amazing. I mean they didn't come from privileged backgrounds, they were just your everyday woman, they just did it on their terms.

Sunday was church. If you did read a few posts back I talked about a pull to work on my relationship with God and my faith. Step one was go to Church and I am so glad I did. The sermon was great as usual and I did take from it. Then in the middle of everything the lights go out in the entire church. The pastor starts to laugh and says he is going to continue and was really witty and quick on his feet. We still had 2 hymns to sing so he had us sing "this little light of mine." Which was hilarious, he stood at the alter with his flashlight and started waving it around. All and all it was a great service. After Church Hubs and I went for a late breakfast and during breakfast my bro called!!! We actually got to talk for about 30 min which was nice. He is such a chatter box when he is having a good time. I can't believe I get to see him next week!!!! I am so pumped!

Then it was off to Dad's house for Lunch with family. My family is very birthday heavy from January to April so we have to do one weekend a month for all the Birthdays. Dinner was terrible. I mean the food was amazing... and totally fattening but I managed. My Dad, I can only assume was out on Saturday night with friends and ended up only getting about 3 hours of sleep. So he was in a pissy mood. When we all sat down at the table and started passing the food around my Grandma made a comment of how food is supposed to be passed on the left, my dad says "well the etiquette police aren't here are they?" My Grandma flashes me a look and I can just see her festering. Well I thought that was the end of it, but Vicky (step mom's mom) wouldn't let it go. Every other thing out of her mouth was how everything had to be passed to the left. I am getting angry at this point because fact of the matter is, my Grandma was correct she was just making a point. So the rest of the evening was spent with my comments being made about passing to the left, my Grandma throwing a card at my dad because he was being a smart ass and then my dad falling asleep until everyone got up to leave..... gotta love family get togethers.

where is the love?

romance :to court or woo romantically; treat with ardor or chivalrousness

I know that I akready posted, but something just popped in to my head that I thought I would write about.
I was reading one of the many blogs that I follow and the topic of this particular post was how the bloggers husband wasn’t romantic. Well, mine isn’t either….. At all.

The other night I was watching “True Life: My marriage is over” when Hubs got home. He sat down and watched it with me and we kind of butted heads on one of the situations.

The husband and wife had been together for 6years married for 3. She was a stay at home mom and I am not sure what he did, but they had nice home and she and the kids were provided for. Well she had started to go out dancing, and not club dancing we are talking country line dancing (I think she called it side step dancing) almost 3 nights a week. When her husband confronted her about it she said that he wasn’t giving her the attention that she craves so she was finding it else where. Now I am not condoning getting all dressed up and leaving your family for 3 nights a week to get attention but I could kind of see where she coming from. Hubs did not. He said that she was in the complete wrong for what she was doing and she was a bad wife and mother for leaving…. I knew the look on my face was one of WTH? And “You must be crazy.” He asked if I agreed and I said that although I didn’t agree with her actions and how she was handling things I could see where she was coming from. I explained to him that he husband thought that it was “romantic” to keep a roof over her head, clothes on her back and food in the cabinets. I told him I see those as a necessity and although I am thankful for what he does I expect to have those things wither it be by his doing alone or in a joint effort.
Now, Hubs doesn’t think it is romantic to do those things he sees it as his manly duty to do those things. But he still wasn’t getting what all the hubbub was. So I laid it out for him. I told him I know you love me; I am reminded of that everyday. But as a woman I need a little extra, to know that you have been thinking about me that day, or that you still see me as the girl you were so smitten with when we first met. He looked blankly at me and I said think of it this way…. Who do you think invented foreplay? A woman, because we can’t just roll over and hop on. I could see a glimmer of hope in him yet, I knew a sex reference would get him. .I said it feels nice to be special. He then tried to tell me that he was romantic and I told him that the last time I got flowers was when he proposed, that was over a year ago. I told him you know you there isn’t enough romance when I say I am crushing on you because you vacuumed.

I don’t know where this post is coming from…. Well I do actually. I read blogs about husbands giving there wives flowers and then having one extra for there new born girl and my heart just melts. I was really hoping he would step up for Valentines Day but really I finally broke down and asked him if he had any plans… and he said no. I feel like if I want any romance I have to create it myself.

Anyway. there is my whinny post for the day... later all.

Love.

TGIF!

I am happy this week is over.



Real happy.



Today is my cheat day and I am dying for Chipotle. Lunch can't come fast enough



Tonight will consist of cooking for my hubs and madre, working out, and catching up on my DVR or renting a moving... I am not sure which one yet. My mom really wants to see the hurt locker which I do too but not at the cost of $4.99 ... meaning I want to wait until it comes to HBO. I am not really into war movies and such but I know as soon as she walks in the door she is going to want to try to see if movies on demand will work. I am going to have to let her down easy. I have been in such a sour mood the past few days, I want something that is going to make me laugh.



Saturday is craft day. I need something that is going to keep me busy this weekend so I am going to make a wreath. It is going to be the one below but with yellow (if I can find it) fabric and a red bow. Hopefully that will keep the hungry monster at bay for a few hours. Hubs is going to cook out on our new grill too, I am so excited!






Sunday is Church, birthday dinner at my Dad's house and then house work. We have so many birthdays from Jan-April that we have to have one birthday dinner a month or we would have to be there almost every weekend for 3 months to get everyone covered.





I think it sounds like a great weekend.... What about you bloggies? What does your weekend look like?

Frustrated

So Hubs sent me this picture at lunch:



Yes are you reading correctly -6.8 lbs.

Am I happy for him? Yes, very.
Am I pissed off at the same time? Hell yes

I wouldn't be so mad if he actually wanted to loose weight and I felt like he was trying. But the fact of the matter is I kind of declared we were loosing weight and he went along with it. Made a goal weight and ate the food I put in front of him and that was it. I just feel deflated. He lost almost as much weight as I wanted to in a month, and all he had to do was go to work. But I still have to go to work, make dinner because he can't "cook healthy" and God forbid he take the time to actually look up a recipe and try, work out and still not loose weight. Great. That's up lifting.

I know men loose weight a lot faster than women, but this is so not fair....

The Healthy life: Healthy food in review

I am down 0.5 lbs last week. Can you tell I didn't work out... at all. I was having a really off week but yesterday was the beginning of week 3 and I had a good 30 min Latin dance cardio work out. I will review the work out later but right now lets talk grub.



Being on a diet you automatically think you are going to be eating cardboard for your diet duration but there are some amazing healthy food out there. This is what I have found


Breakfast :
My breakfast is pretty straight forward, I either have frosted mini wheats or Quakers weight control oatmeal in maple brown sugar. Can we say YUM!!!! I actually prefer the weight control to the regular, I know it may all be in my head but I think it tastes more mapley and sweet and it is the perfect size for yours truly. I have branched out from my original flavored mini wheats to the strawberry delight and ladies... delish! I am very picky about my fruit flavored food because I seldom think it tastes like the actual fruit but I am sooooooo glad I took a chance with this one.


Lunch:
I now am a brown bagger (or in my case white polka dotted lunch boxer) for lunch and I wanted something healthy, quick and easy. So what is easier than a microwave meal? Pretty much nothing. You tend to walk a very thin (ha!) line with mwm (microwave meals), yes they maybe low in calories but you have to look at the whole label, look at the sodium content the grams of fat and compare the choices you have.


I decided I would stick with Healthy choice meals 1. because they have a HUGE variety of foods, not just frozen and 2. they were the healthier option. Here is what I have had this week and my thoughts...



Sweet Asian Pot stickers: This little gem is awesome. The pot stickers actually taste like pot stickers you would get from a Chinese restaurant. I was so afraid the dough was going to be gooey but it was perfect. The sauce is a little to be desired but the pot stickers more than make up for it. Other bonus... it's a vegetarian meal!


Portobella Marsala Pasta: This is probably the most flavorful healthy frozen meal I have had. Everything just comes together in this meal and it is just darn tasty...



Tuscan Style chicken: This has the potential, but I was left wanting. You feel like you get more than enough food, but the sauce just was missing some punch you know. The first think I said after my first bite was "this needs something, some salt and pepper maybe."

I will be starting Tastefully Tuesday next week and review and share some of the healthy and yummy recipes I have found.

Have a happy Friday eve everyone!!!!

Got some good news, and some bad news

Good news first:
Hubs got a call from the employment agency that Ashland Chemical is working with. He did a phone interview that went pretty well and then he sent her his resume and now we wait to see if they will want him to come in next week for a second interview. It would mean a pay increase and a set schedule for Hubs! Pray that he gets this job, we need it.

Bad news:
I got a call from my Dad last night and I could tell something was wrong right off the bat. He said he had some really bad news, now my mind always goes to the worst possible place, so I think something is wrong with my Grandma so I brace myself for what I think is coming. He says "we had to put Scout down today." I was dumbfounded. I was caught so off guard it took a minute to register what he had said. Scout was his 8 year old Shealtie, probably the coolest dog ever. He said that starting on Friday he was acting funny, sluggish and they chopped it up to him eating something he shouldn't have....aka toilet paper. But he continued to get worse and by Monday he wouldn't even get up anymore. My step mom and little Bro took him to the vet and they ran some test on him and found that his Gallbladder had ruptured, and there was really nothing they could do for him. My dad was in tears and I told him I was sorry, this dog was his buddy, his pal and he was gone. I will never forget the first time I saw Scout shut the door.... you read right, shut the door. When my Dad broke his foot it was too much to stand up and wait for him to be finished out side so he taught him to shut the door. A favorite party trick for the family, he was like a sponge and learned every trick my Dad taught him. He will be greatly missed.

God is calling...

and it is time for me to pick up.

A few months ago I took a pretty amazing bible study that really opened my eyes and heart to a lot of different things. I felt more connected in those weeks to God than I have my entire life. I have never been a "practicing" Christian as I call it. I never went to church, never prayed and completely shut myself down. For a time I didn't even believe there was a God but now as I look back I was scared, scared of letting go. I used to ask so many questions and they were of course left unanswered, I asked for signs. I kept God in a box and only called upon him at my choosing.

After years in the dark (I see it as tough love), I went to this amazing bible study. It was such and after thought too, I mean my bestest asked me one day in an email if I wanted to go and I found myself 5 days later in study group. I took everything in that was said, and for some reason it just clicked. I raised my eyebrow and said "OK, I hear you." I just let go of all my questions, unanswered prayers and let God take control. It was awesome, my moments of prayer became ones of solitude and peace. I saw the power of prayer work right in front of my eyes and what do I do?....

I am back to where I started again. I am not sure when the change happened but it did. I am back in the dark, desperately searching. After my last post I saw the words on the page and said to myself "How will I know what to do?" then I realized I wasn't asking myself I was asking God, for guidance. Then I felt the pull, I need to connect with him again, and keep him in my life as a main pillar. I took the first step, looked up worship times at my old church and I am also considering a class called Alpha. This class states that it is an introduction to the Christian experience in a non-confrontational environment, No question is too simple or too hostile.

I need to stop my life and ask for directions

hmmmm. this is a though one.

If I could go back and plan my life out I would already be out of school, working in the field of my degree, married and working towards saving towards a house. But, it didn't quite happen like that, I mean does it really ever?

Even in high school I wanted to go to culinary school. A friend of mine and I were going to move to New York and he was going to take Broadway by storm and I was going be a rock star in the kitchen. We went as far as looking for apartments, ha!

School just never seemed to work out for me, some of which was my fault and some was money but that is neither here nor there. The years past and I still don't have a degree, this is something I want terribly. But, I seem to be at a cross roads right now. I am trying to go back to culinary school and it isn't as smooth a sailing as I was told it would be. Money is also a big issue right now, or should I say the lack there of. So now I am faced with a difficult decision, do I keep plugging away and try to go back to school? Or do I just forget it, get a second job to pay off all my debt and then just move on?

I confided in one of my bestest that my dream is to be a stay at home mom. What I told her was, I am speaking in terms of me and me only here (this is not to offend), I don't want to be 30 and just starting my family. I can't stress the I in that sentence enough, when I told bestest that she looked at me crazy and I almost felt guilty for saying it. So why go back to school and get my degree if I am not going to use it? When she questioned what I said it showed me how big of a decision this is going to be and how much I am going to have to let go for either choice.

I know that I can go back to school but I also know that nothing is guaranteed. Me wanting something doesn't mean it is going to happen, and me planning it a certain way doesn't mean it is going to work out that way. I am not naive to this, I am allowed to dream of days at home with my children, but then accept the reality as I drop them off at daycare in my chef's jacket.

The healthy life: I.hate.weekends.

Period. I hate them. They are so much harder than I expected.

As soon as the clock strikes 5 on Friday, a beast is awakend inside of me and it needs to eat... all the freaking time!!!!!

Not to mention I have my woman's monthly working against me (first one since Oct) but come on! The hits just keep on comming.

I am up 1lb, but it is cool back to it today and I will get the 1lb back off in no time.

The Healthy life: some ideas

I have been pondering the rewards issue and I do have some prerequisites for my rewards;

1.They can't be food, or involve food
2. They have to be for me,Not for the house.
3. They have to be something that isn't going to come with loosing weight (i.e. get my rings re sized)

really that is it.

This is what I have thus far (this list is still up for revision)
210lbs: Mary Kay product
200lbs: A Pandora Charm
190lbs: a piece of Lia Sophia Jewelry
180lbs: A new out fit
170lbs: Mani/pedi
160lbs:Day of pampering, a massage or maybe a facial
150lbs: Go back to dance class
140lbs: A Coach purse (a real one)
130lbs: The makeover! New Clothes! New hair cut! New Me!

The healthy life: Rewards?

To reward or not to reward? that is the question.

A friend of mine, who is also on a weight loss journey, were gabbing at lunch yesterday and she said she made a list of rewards to give herself along the way. Brilliant! Why didn't I think of that... oh that's right because I always reward myself with food, well fiddledede. It made me think, I have goals... all after the weight loss has already happened. So what should be my goals for the in between the little milestones that come with loosing 90 lbs?

I need some ideas....

The Healthy Life: a week down 45 more to go

Well I did it! I lost 2 lbs this week!

What I learned this week:
-I found it was actually easy to stay on track and count my calories...during the week
- The weekends are going to be killer, I need to find a hobby that keeps me busy
-I need to plot my meal times better, 2 nights last week I came home so hungry, blood sugar crashing that hubs almost had to pry Christmas candy from my hands.
- Now that I am getting comfortable, I need to kick up my exercise.



I am off to a great start, but I find that I am left wanting in the exercise department.

While the wii fit makes exercise fun, I am burning calories and that is it. I know the wii has strength training and yoga but when your butt doesn't fit on the board it is just uncomfortable. I don't want to loose all this and still be flabby. So I am starting a hunt for something at home, that will help me build and tone my muscles.

I have heard great things about Jillian Michael's 30 day shred, granted I think I am going to feel the effects of my old life style while trying to do a push up. I am going to compare and see which one I think is going to be the best for my goal.



Something to look forward too: being able to dance again. For 3 years I was a highland dancer and I was the greatest at it but I loved it. I loved all of it, the kilts, bag pipes, the big pounding bass drum and it just made me smile inside and out. But as my weight began to sky rocket, I had to stop dancing. I didn't know I had bad feet and knees until I gained 60 lbs, my body couldn't handle it. I walked away from something that made me happy, that challenged me, and was one hell of a good work out. I can't wait until I can strap up my gillies and starting flinging again!

The Healthy life: the ups and downs of weigh ins

Last night I was exhausted, so exhausted that after dinner I fell asleep until 8:40.... not a stellar choice on my part.

What I am trying to get at was I didn't work out last night (boooo, hiss). But I just counted up my calories for the day and didn't even break 1000... which, to tell you the truth I didn't even mean to do.

I know that I shouldn't weigh at night but I woke up around 11:30 and was curious. So, I go downstairs and get the wii fit set up and step on. It says that I have gained 2 lbs...WHAT!?!?!?! this can't be right, so I step off, and do it again.... it says I have now gained 4lbs. At this point even the wii fit says this is weird, it is late and to do another body test tomorrow at 6:15pm which is when I did my first initial body test. In that split second, where I saw that number say +2 I was already at my fridge eating cookie dough.... but I pulled it back in and said try again tomorrow. It is amazing how happy I was about the 1.3lbs and how gaining 2lbs can bring my world crashing down in a blaze of over eating.

This is where I have had a lot of trouble. When I am loosing weight nothing can stop me (but me) but if there is even the slightest flux in my weight I think "well, this isn't working, I guess I was meant to be fat." and then push myself to the brink of a food induced comma.

This time, yes I still got upset. But! I stopped myself, slapped myself out of it and actually looked at the situation. Heck, even my wii fit was telling me something was off and to try again tomorrow. This may not be a weight loss victory, but it was a victory none the less. I know that doing this for 46 weeks is a HUGE undertaking and I am going to feel overwhelmed, depresed, and just plain sad, but if I keep having these little (big) victories then I KNOW I can do this.


Tonight is back on track... Have a great Tuesday everyone!

meow...

Last night was rough.

I went to bed around 10:45, a little later than I had hoped but I I did fall right to sleep which was good. Then I was awoken from my slumber by my husband yelling at my pooch, a cat hissing and then said pooch jumping on me because she was in trouble and thought that I could save her. Again thankfully, I fell right back to sleep....

All night I fought my dog. Yes, she sleeps in bed with us, that was my mistake, and I can say that I am paying for it now. She has been going through a phase of sleeping in between Hubs and I, I am talking head on the pillow under the covers. It was cute at first but after her having running dreams down my back it's not so cute anymore.

5:30am rolls around and I am awakened by the LOUD wailing of the devil cat. He started crying and didn't stop until 7am. I refused to get out of bed because I knew he had food, water and a clean litter box because I had checked before I went to bed.... Then he starts to body slam the door and paw at it, this was driving my dog crazy. I finally gave in at about 6:40am and probably over reacted but opened the door and said WHAT!?!?!?! and he pranced over to his food bowl... which was empty. I was confused because like I said I checked before I went to bed. Remember when I said I woke up when Hubs came to bed because he was yelling. Yeah, well Dot got to the cat's food and ate it, while hubs didn't look to see what she had done. I felt bad for devil cat. I really did. So I filled his bowl up and went about my business.

Needless to say I wasn't in a great mood this morning. Great Monday!

I did get to talk to my Brother yesterday, it was funny because I was asleep on the sofa and his ringtone started to play and I sat straight up and yelled IT'S BRO!!!!!! It was sooooooooo good to hear his voice. He is still having a really hard time. I tried to cheer him up but there was so much info he needed to give me in a 2 minute time frame I think it fell on deaf ears. He said they are being given more phone time in the next few weeks. I am so amped to go to Ft. Leonard Wood for his graduation on Feb. 5th, my mom SIL and I are driving out there to support him and to see him before OCS. He won't get a break like he did for Basic, but he will get Internet, and phone privileges. So, I guess there is a trade off.

Finally I want to give a Birthday day Shout out, Erin over at Dishes and Wishes!!!! Happy Birthday Chicka!!!!!

The healthy life: the first weekend

This. weekend.was.hard. when I am at work it is so easy for me to stay on track calorie wise. On the weekends though, when it is cold and snowy outside It is hard to stay away from the fridge. I just wanted to munch all day long. It was really hard but I got through it.

I am happy to say that I am down 1.3 lbs!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I am so excited! Who would have thought 1.3 lbs would make my day? It is a little victory in my 46 week weight loss journey.

Oh the possibilities

My bestie Crystal, over at The Story of Us said that she couldn't wait to go shopping during my weight loss. Up until this point I guess I hadn't thought about it. I am trying to break myself of saying "diet" because this is more than that. This is me trying to better myself. But being so enthralled in articles, nutrition labels, and calorie counters I didn't even think about revamping my wardrobe.


I don't want to get ahead of myself. My mantra is "take this day by day". I am a person that needs instant gratification. That is why I think I didn't succeed in the past, if the weight didn't just melt away I fell in to a sort of diet depression and would ruin whatever progress I would have made.

I did, for a little while last night, let myself think about it. How I would walk past Lane Bryant and bid them a gracious farewell and say a warm welcome to stores that I hadn't stepped foot in, in years. I love fashion. You would never guess it if you saw me or my closet, I have been dressing a little ho hum these days. Over size sweater, worn blue jeans and hiking boots almost every day since it got cold. It is amazing how much this can effect you, I know the clothes on my back don't make me ME, but think about how much you express with your clothing. It is like a tattoo and a piercing, but ever changing. Not to mention it is just FUN!!!! Fashion is fun and I have been missing out. I know it is me holding myself back but I don't want to miss out anymore. I want to take my style to the next level and not be afraid to try those leggings on, or feel comfortable in sleeveless.


I think one of my bigger triumphs will be to go in to clothing stores where I have always been on the outside looking in, like Ralphie looking at his Red Ryder B B gun, and walk through the doors with my head held high and actually find something I like and have it fit...maybe even a little to big :)

The healthy life: Day one

I wasn't going to start this until Monday but I had to start today.

I have been keeping a very strict food journal these past couple a weeks and needless to say I was blown away. I know I was eating more than the recommended calories on any given day but some days were just out of control, I think my highest was in the 3500 range. I just had to start today. I didn't see a reason to put it off any longer.

Day one of week one and I feel strong, I feel confident. I got up this morning and dusted off my lunch box because this new healthy lifer wasn't going to Wendy's today, and filled it with healthy goodness. This morning I have ate breakfast! I know, I was shocked too. I had frosted mini wheat and a banana. I started to eye my diet coke but opted, on this cold snowy Thursday, for some green tea. It was ok... I may have to try out some different teas to find one I like. Any suggestions bloggies?

As I sit here and munch on some baby carrots, I have planned out my day eating wise. and exercise wise and I couldn't be happier.

The Healthy Life: The plan

Well everyone it is done. The plan is in place and I think it is totally doable. With help from the world wide web and one of the healthiest people this is what I came up with:

These are the goals:

Eating and lifestyle:

stay within 1200-1400 calorie range

Eat lower calorie and lower fat foods

Eat moderate carbs

Switch to whole grain

Keep a food journal (started yesterday)

Drink lots of water and tea instead of soda

Really read and learn the good and bad things to look for on a nutrition label

Exercise:

6 days a week; 3 of aerobic, 3 of strength training (alternating)

Start with 30 min exercises and increase time at my own speed

as promised here are starting pictures...... le sigh.

Yes I am standing on my toilet. I told Hubs about the blogging aspect of this weight loss crusade and told him that he better get a new memory card for our camera stat so I don't have to use my crappy phone pictures anymore. you can clearly see the areas I am going to be targeting in my workouts... ahem mid section.

P.S. I look preggers in this picture. Now I remember why I don't take pictures from the side.....

I will go ahead and say it. As you can tell this is going to take a lot of work. But, this time it just feels different, I feel more determined than I ever have to follow through and get healthy.

Does anyone have any good suggestions for books on this subject matter? Not Diet books per say but lifestyle books? Is that being to picky?

There you go bloggies, have a wonderful day and see you back tomorrow for another installment of the Healthy life.

The healthy life: Getting started...where to start?

I know I said there would be a plan.... but I don't have one yet.

I know I want to loose weight but where is the starting point?

I have tried many times to loose weight and I have tried many weight loss aids to help. Everything from Nutrisystems to slimquick and I have had mixed results, obviously.

The best:
Weight watchers
Atkins
Slim quick cleanse

The worst:
South beach
Nutrisystems <---- gold star for horribleness

So with everything I have tried I am overwhelmed with my options for weight loss. What will work? Should I use a diet aid? Can I really only eat meat and cheese for 2 weeks? Why is it $65.00 for 3 months to join weight watchers?

I started my research. Because I am on a strict budget and can't afford to get a membership anywhere I am on my own for this.... Gulp!

I was scouring the Internet for more information on how to get started. How can I take my first step in to a healthy life? Then I stumbled upon webmd ( a home away from home for us hypocondriacts), and they actually have some really good insight and information about my body and what it is doing. Ok, take it with a grain of salt because it is a website but still a good generalization none the less.

After I put in all of my info this is what it told me.

YOUR GOAL:Over the next 90 days, you would like to lose 24 pounds(actually 22 but that wasn't an option) .

YOUR STARTING POINT:
1. YOUR BODY MASS INDEX (BMI) Based on your weight and height your BMI is 42.

2. YOUR RESTING METABOLIC RATE (RMR) Based on your age, gender, height, weight, and waist size, your RMR is 1706. Your body uses that many calories just by living and breathing.
3. YOUR RMR + ACTIVITY You reported that you are sedentary. Based on your physical activity level and RMR, your body uses approximately 2047 calories per day.

YOUR PLAN:In order for you to meet your three-month weight loss goal, you will need a daily deficit of 933 calories. You say that you want to lose weight both by cutting calories and burning calories. That means you will need to limit your daily intake to approximately 1200 calories and increase your physical activity enough to burn 86 calories.

YOUR ULTIMATE GOAL: By sticking to the 90-day plan, you will be back to the weight you said you were most comfortable as an adult, (130 pounds) in about 46 weeks.

46 weeks. I am in for the long haul but I am so excited to start! Now, I am going to start devising a plan. I know for sure, I am going to keep a food journal, in most success stories I have read this was a tremendous help to a lot of people. I have never done it so it is worth a try. Next in my research is the pros and cons of low calorie, low carb and low fat diets. I list of VS. if you will (and we all know how much I love lists).

Goal for the day: research the pros and cons of the different "Low" lifestyles, create a plan, and(this one is going to be the hardest) pick a super cute outfit and say cheese! I am going to be documenting my weight loss from week to week so you all can see my progress.

Alright bloggies stay warm and have a great Tuesday!!

The healthy life: confession

forgive me body for I have sinned.


Where do you start when you are trying to get healthy and loose weight? I am starting with a confession. I need to get this all out, I am going to be cleansing my body so why not my soul as well. This is my weight confession:


A weighing history:
I have been over weight most of my adult life. I started gaining weight when I was about 9 and kept piling it on until the summer going in to my senior year. I was at a current weight high for me (160lbs) I went to France and by the time I came back I had lost a few pounds... great! But by the end of the summer that few pounds turned in to 30lbs and I looked somkin! I was 17 and at my dream weight of 130lbs or a size 10. That time, although short, was the best I have felt physically ever. So for the period of a year I was in love with my body, I did break my foot right out of high school and gained about 10 lbs of lack of energy. I stayed about a size 12 for all of 2005 but then... Hocking happened. Being on my own cooking my own food, buying my own groceries led to more weight gain. The freshman 20 so now I was about 160 bringing in the new year 2006. Then I went through a person hell, and am glad to say I came out the other side broken and weight out of control. I came home from school tipping the scales at 200lbs. I finally had to break down and buy new jeans...size 18 great. The weight kept piling on as my life is now spent in the sitting position at work. I didn't know what to do, my waist was getting bigger and my self confidence at a new low.... I hit a new low. most of 2009 was spent with my head in a toilet. I started to purge. Absolutely everything that I put in my system besides water was tossed. I felt this immense pressure, especially being a bride, to be thin. It was something that I vowed I would be before I walked down the aisle. I looked up anorexia tips, like wear a hair tie around your wrist and every time you think about food snap it until it hurts, or always chew gum, brush your teeth before every meal so the food tastes bad.... I was sick. I lost about 30lbs doing this and felt like crap and smelled like barf for nine months. Then the wedding came and went and I started to let myself eat meals and keep them down. Needless, to say I gained almost all the weight back. Which I knew would happen.



The now:
I am 222lbs.
Still not a personal high but embarrassing none the less.
I am, for my BMI, OBESE.
My diet right now is a mixture of high sugar, high carbohydrate. I have Dysthymic Disorder (which is a disorder that comes with depression) My body craves the food it needs to become chemically balanced and create energy . When you have this disorder you are (using a metaphor here)constantly running on half to a quarter tank of gas. You are never full. I am never not depressed in some way shape of form, I just have good days and bad days. Now I am not saying this is the single cause of my weight gain but it does put a kink in to things.But eating a tub of icing because it was there wasn't a good idea either. So what do you do when your body is telling you one thing and your waist line is telling you another?

The change:
I want to make this change for my future. I owe it to myself to give myself a fighting chance to live a life without cancer, diabetes, high cholesterol and high blood pressure. When Hubs and I actually had a serious talk about children and then that TLC special came on I knew I had to do it for my kids too. I want to be able to keep up with them, teach them the importance of a healthy life style.

Up next: The healthy life: The plan

Well hello 2010

I am back from my trip down south.


I welcomed in the new year in, much warmer, Birmingham AL. It was really great to see the new family again. I was kind of left with a bad taste in my mouth after the wedding but this weekend really helped me.


We left on New Year's Eve and due to my lack of time management skills we were late to airport. Let's say hubs and I came to the agreement that I am to always shower before him. Anyway, we did make our flight and made to Bham with out any problems. Once there we had our Christmas, which I didn't expect anything after getting a grill from the in laws but we made out like bandits.



I got:
a PANDORA bracelet with a M and K charm
a necklace and earring set
a picture frame
an itunes gift card
a bed, bath and beyond gift card
"together" figurine from willow tree
a monogrammed dish towel
a monogrammed cooler glass
and personalized gift cards

I will say, being ashamed, I didn't even make it to midnight.... I know, I know....

It was the first time in years that I haven't stayed up to watch the ball drop, but I was exhausted. So I drank some bubbly and toasted that it was the new year somewhere.

The next day was spent in front of the tv praising and cursing (loudly) our beloved football teams. Both of our fav football teams won which made for a happy husband and wife, even though I about had a heart attack during the Auburn game.

We lazied around the rest of the weekend and played with the in laws new puppies Gus and Phoebe.

It was a good mini vay-cay and I am happy to be home but wish a fairy would have come and taken all of the Christmas decorations down.... well I guess it is back to the old grind.

what you will see coming up in the life of the new Mrs.G:
The healthy life: where to start
Picture001: day one of my 365 day picture quest